Thursday, November 26, 2009

History of God and Evolution

God was sitting and was very bored. He had enough of the angels. He wanted to do something different. So he created the earth, sun, moon, stars and the universe. It still did not please him. So he created a creature called Adam – the man - and put him in the heaven. Despite being in heaven, Adam was very disoriented and unhappy. So God decided to create his companion Eve – the woman. Adam suddenly perked up. God told them to be happy but warned them not to eat the apple from the apple tree. However, Eve proceeded to get the apple and shared it with Adam. Or was it Adam who got the apple and shared it with Eve? Heck! It was such a long time ago that I was told this story, I forget.

At that point God got very angry. He threw them out of heaven straight to the earth. Ouch! Must have hurt. How come they did not break their bums or at least legs? Anyway they kept eating a lot of apples and produced a lot of little Adams and Eves and lived unhappily ever after.

Once upon time there was guy by the name of Charles Darwin somewhere in Britain. He had a house, wife and children. His daughter got very sick. He and his wife constantly prayed to God to save their daughter. Sadly, the daughter passed away from her illness – I am very sincere that it was a very sad event in the Darwin family's life. Charles got very angry with God and said he shall prove that he is a fraud and does not exist.

Later in life Charles himself got very ill. He had all kinds of ailments including eczema. He started going to a witch-doctor who prescribed him a lot of cold showers but that did not help much. He got angry at people in general so he wrote a book called "On The Origin Of Species" and declared humans descendant of apes. Since then many followers of Darwin have been improving on his theory.

Moral of the Story:
1) Never make God angry, as he will expel you from heaven.
2) Never get those evolutionary academics/intellectuals angry. They will throw a temper tantrum at you and call you ignorant. Their livelihood depends on their research, you know.

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  1. I'm sorry LD but I have to call you out. Where did you get this garbage about Darwin and his motivations? Do you really believe he got pissed off with God and decided to write a book to do Him in?

    Why did you neglect his experience at the University of Edinburgh and Cambridge, his association with Charles Lyell and other leading scientists and his 5-year expedition aboard HMS Beagle?

    Your depiction of Darwin is unjust, grossly incomplete and even childish. Does that really suit your purposes?

  2. MoS, don’t get upset. That is not like you. Charles Darwin did lose his daughter and became exceptionally distraught. Also he was one sick puppy and did go to a witch doctor who poured gallons of cold-water on his head. Actually his poor daughter died because he sought the same treatment for her. I am not saying that she died of cold water but it did hasten her death. It is all part of history about Charles Darwin. That is how big genius he was. The man was unstable.

    As far as evolution is concerned I am not fully convinced yet. More recently goal-post on evolution has been moved when the story of Ardi was published. I wrote a post on that too. As you said in another comment:
    “Don't despair. In relative terms, modern science is still in its infancy. We're only beginning to unlock knowledge that explains theories.” And I will respond here that I fully agree with that.

    All I am saying is that I know that I don’t know much about the riddle of life. We have a long way to go. Daily, medics are finding out something new about human body. For example now they are getting some idea that how HIV cells fool the immune cells and medics are trying to get some kind of injection to fight this disease. Again they are at preliminary level. And they are at preliminary level on so many other health fronts. One day a magic pill cure all, same pill the next day is a poison/death pill as the story goes about Celebrex and many others. At one time, centuries ago, Chinese doctors thought mercury pills will make a person invincible and killed their king of mercury poisoning in the process.

    One serious objection I have about your Mentalwhateve friend is that he is so cocksure of himself and called me all kinds of names. Don’t fall in the same trap because I do have a lot of respect for you. All self-righteous cocksure type turn me off whether they are religious folks or claim to be scientists.

    By the way this post was supposed be purely light-hearted and make fun of both creationists and evolutionists.

  3. LD, I complete disagree with you... Getting upset is a lot like Mound!


    Seriously though, I think it's fair to say that the theory of evolution is much more than JUST a theory. While I must confess my own ignorance as to how much of the evolutionary theory is based on fact, the whole thing just seems to make perfect sense.

  4. Fish buddy, I understand what you mean .LoL

    As far as evolutionary theory is concerned there may be a lot of validity to it as different species do change over time. Bible’s version of fixed species is not reasonable then Bible has been written and rewritten many times to meet political needs of the day.

    It is the fanaticism of this Mentalwhatever guy that I am amused by and having fun with it. He just does not get it and keeps calling me a religious righwing fanatic. My oh my I have been called a lot of names in my life but not "rightwinger" before. He even compared me with the likes of Sarah Palin. The guy is plain kooky.